Dear kind, benevolent, Universe,

I would be very happy if two tickets for the Melissa Etheridge show in Dallas, this Friday, August 15, suddenly appeared. I know this is a random request, but it would bring me a great amount of joy.

Failing that, if you could present an opportunity for me to safely and legally generate $105 by the end of banking business Thursday (tomorrow) so that I could purchase said tickets, I will be equally joyful.

Yours,
Dakotawitch